Wouldn’t it be nice if cash flowed both ways?
As I may have maxed out my credit cards while doing the children’s back to school shopping, I started a small tally in my head: how much have I spent on my kids?
Then, a thought entered my mind: "What could I get my offspring to do to make money for me?" They are still pretty young, so hard labor won't do. I need to be pretty creative.
My youngest, who really enjoys giving my wife and me foot rubs for a buck, has amassed a small fortune. Maybe I could expand on that. Maybe I could send him to a school that teaches massage therapy, and after he has mastered his craft, we could book him appointments. How funny would it be to give him a portable heated table for his next birthday?
I don’t want to lose sight of what is really important, so only when he is done with his school homework will I allow him to finish memorizing his reflexology chart.
If his hands ever do fail him, I have another great idea how he could make some cash…for me. He has always had great phone skills, especially with older folks. I could set up a 976 phone number and create a call center for lonely old people. I could advertise the number in the back of "AARP Magazine" and "Good Housekeeping." My boy is so good, I don’t even need to make a script for him. He instinctively knows how to ask the right questions, gems such as, “How’s your back?” and “I wish that I were there with you. I would rub your bunions.”
This scheme would surely be a major success until his older brother haphazardly picked up the phone. Then I would need to have a scripted cheat sheet, or else we may have a lawsuit on our hands. “If I’m not in the will, I don’t love you.” Yes, another 30-second phone call that didn’t make any money.
My oldest is good with his hands, so maybe I could get him to start working at a local garage. He would be the perfect greasemonkey, and since he hasn’t hit a major growth spurt yet, they wouldn’t even need to put the cars up on lifts. He could just crawl under them and do some work. Maybe he could work with some repo men, although that may be too dangerous. If he gets tired of all this, I could have him make fake Gucci merchandise and then sell it downtown. Tourists will buy anything.
Until I can get these schemes up and running, it’s still up to me to pay for those school supplies, clothes, sports equipment and let's not forget that there are no free sports leagues. But please, make sure to keep on the lookout for 1-976-GRANDPA and 1-976-GRANDMA.
Source http://scarsdale.patch.com/
Then, a thought entered my mind: "What could I get my offspring to do to make money for me?" They are still pretty young, so hard labor won't do. I need to be pretty creative.
My youngest, who really enjoys giving my wife and me foot rubs for a buck, has amassed a small fortune. Maybe I could expand on that. Maybe I could send him to a school that teaches massage therapy, and after he has mastered his craft, we could book him appointments. How funny would it be to give him a portable heated table for his next birthday?
I don’t want to lose sight of what is really important, so only when he is done with his school homework will I allow him to finish memorizing his reflexology chart.
If his hands ever do fail him, I have another great idea how he could make some cash…for me. He has always had great phone skills, especially with older folks. I could set up a 976 phone number and create a call center for lonely old people. I could advertise the number in the back of "AARP Magazine" and "Good Housekeeping." My boy is so good, I don’t even need to make a script for him. He instinctively knows how to ask the right questions, gems such as, “How’s your back?” and “I wish that I were there with you. I would rub your bunions.”
This scheme would surely be a major success until his older brother haphazardly picked up the phone. Then I would need to have a scripted cheat sheet, or else we may have a lawsuit on our hands. “If I’m not in the will, I don’t love you.” Yes, another 30-second phone call that didn’t make any money.
My oldest is good with his hands, so maybe I could get him to start working at a local garage. He would be the perfect greasemonkey, and since he hasn’t hit a major growth spurt yet, they wouldn’t even need to put the cars up on lifts. He could just crawl under them and do some work. Maybe he could work with some repo men, although that may be too dangerous. If he gets tired of all this, I could have him make fake Gucci merchandise and then sell it downtown. Tourists will buy anything.
Until I can get these schemes up and running, it’s still up to me to pay for those school supplies, clothes, sports equipment and let's not forget that there are no free sports leagues. But please, make sure to keep on the lookout for 1-976-GRANDPA and 1-976-GRANDMA.
Source http://scarsdale.patch.com/
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